


You don't know what you have until it's gone.

by leviiackermanns



Category: Batman - All Media Types, DCU (Comics), Nightwing (Comics), Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Brotherly Bonding, Bruce Wayne is a Bad Parent, Damian actually cares about Tim, Enemies to Friends, Hurt/Comfort, Jason is smitten, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mentions of Alcohol Abuse, OOC, OOC Damian, Platonic Cuddling, Protective Jason Todd, Slow Burn, Swearing, future jaytim, mentions of abuse, uhh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-09-06 13:58:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 16,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16834000
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leviiackermanns/pseuds/leviiackermanns
Summary: Tim seemingly vanishes off the face of the earth. Wayne Enterprises says that The CEO was on a much deserved long holiday, but some people were not convinced.Red Robin hadn’t been on patrol for months, it was unlike him, Robin is worried while Batman seems to just ignore the issue. Damian ropes Dick and Jason into his need to find the former Robin.They’d all come to realise one thing; You don't know what you have until it's gone.





	1. Damian's Concern.

**Author's Note:**

> so this will be quite OOC? I really wanted to write a self indulgent jaytim fic where there is bonding with the Robins and them acknowledging that they’ve all been fucked up? I have no beta and this is going to just be an experimental chapter, I am going to write a lot more to this but I want to get this out to test the waters since I’ve never written jaytim or the batboys before. 
> 
> As reference in this the ages are Dick 25, Jason 22, Tim 19, Damian 15. Tim has also not died in this universe. There is also perspective shifts all over the place. sorry.
> 
> Also I out as many tags because I’m weird like that this has been a psa thank
> 
> Sorry if this sucks, I hope you enjoy

Robin was in Red Hood’s territory, he’d snuck away from his father to track down Red Hood. Damian needed Red Robin’s assistance on a case he was working away from Batman, but, neither Tim nor Red Robin had been spotted in months. Damian wasn’t too proud to admit that he was a touch concerned about Drake’s disappearing act. None of them went more than a few days without contacting each other, even Todd kept in contact with them either through Red Robin or Oracle. Kidnapping and death was far too common in their business, and as much as Tim pissed Damian off, Damian knew that Tim was  _ needed _ and the evidence of that was starting to rear its ugly head in Gotham.

That was why he was perched waiting on a rooftop in Crime Alley for the Red Hood to show up and kick him out of his territory. 

“What do you want, Demon?” Came the electronically distorted voice from behind him. 

Damian sighed and stood from where he was crouching. “I’m concerned about Red Robin’s disappearance. He’s been gone three months and no one, not even Superboy, has heard from him.”

“I know.” Was all the reply he got from Jason.

“Have you found anything?” Damian asked, he knew that Jason and Tim were on somewhat better terms than they were before. They’d worked together a few times, with Tim even managing to get Jason to stop killing, a feat that not even his father had managed to achieve. Damian didn’t fully understand their tentative friendship but he wasn’t going to judge them.

Jason hit the release mechanism for his helmet, pulling it off, revealing the domino underneath. “Honestly, I checked all his safe houses, his apartment, even his office. There’s nothing.” Jason sighed. “I would think he’s just vanished from the face of the earth but…” 

“But?”

Jason looked up at the sky then back to Damian. “I went to my actual apartment, my home, and there was a note on my table. It was from Red, it just said ‘Don’t kill’”

Damian frowned. “Has Oracle been looking?” 

“Yeah.” Jason said quietly. “Nothing, Red left everything behind, no cell, no cards, nothing.”

“I’ll call Nightwing. We need to find him.” Damian started walking towards the rooftops that lead away from the Red Hood territory.

“Why do you care? You’ve never liked him, I have at least been trying to make up for my past mistakes.” Jason called to him.

Damian stopped short. Why did he care? It was simple really. “I came to the realisation, a few days ago, that as much as Red and I come to blows often, he is  _ needed _ by Gotham, by us. You must see it? The four of us need each other, even if we’re too blinded by father to see it.” 

“See what?” Jason asked, hesitantly.

“We abused him.” With that Damian lept from the roof, shooting his grapple and disappearing into the night.

* * *

A few nights later, Dick had called Damian and Jason to the house he shared with Barbara in Gotham. Jason was honestly glad the Demon Bat had come to him when he did. Hopefully with his, Dick’s and Barbara’s help they should find Tim in no time.

Jason had brought over a pasta dish for them to eat while they discussed how to go about finding Tim. Jason had barely knocked on the door before it was opened revealing Dick. Dick stepped aside wordlessly to let Jason enter his home.

“I brought pasta for dinner.” Jason said. Jason wasn’t entirely uncomfortable being here, he and Dick had come to some sort of truce well over a year ago, but they were far from the brothers that Dick wanted them to be. 

Dick took the dish from Jason’s hands, heading into the kitchen. Jason stood quietly in the living room, the glow of lamps and the fire the only things lighting the room. It was cosy, Jason had to admit. Jason made his way over to the fireplace to warm up his hands, noticing the picture frames. There was a few of Dick and Damian, Dick and Babs, Dick, Damian and Tim. The picture that stood out most was one that had a nicer, thicker frame. It looked like it was make out of reused beachwood. It was a picture of Dick and Jason. Jason remembered the picture being taken. It was a few months before he was kidnapped by the Joker. In the picture both of them were at the breakfast nook in the manor, looking down at something and laughing. It was one of very, very few fond memories he had of Dick and his time in the Manor.

Jason noticed there were no photos of Bruce.

“You made it.” Came Damian’s voice from behind him. Damian came and joined him at the fire.

“What did you mean?” Jason asked, referring to the night in Crime Alley. It had been niggling at Jason. He had an idea as to what Damian had been talking about, but he needed to hear exactly what the kid had meant.

“I’ll explain at dinner.” Damian replied quietly. “Let’s go.”

Jason followed Damian into the kitchen. Barbara smiled at Jason in greeting, a smile that Jason returned. Even after Jason’s return, he never hated Babs. He simply couldn’t.

Jason sat down beside Damian as Dick plated up the reheated pasta. Once they were settled and had started eating Damian cleared his throat, gathering the attention of the others at the table.

“I’ll explain what I meant about us abusing Drake, then we can continue in our combined efforts to find him.” Damian took a bite of his meal, chewing slowly, thinking about what he was going to say. “What I mean is simple. We’ve greatly taken advantage of Tim. Not only that, two of us have been physically cruel towards Tim, that in at least my part, was for petty reasons.

“I was never told how Tim became Robin. I know that he was smart enough to figure it out on his own. He tried to help father after Jason’s ‘death’ and trained  _ hard _ to become Robin. Father held Jason’s apparent death over Tim’s head for the year that he was Robin. Not only that but he also had to deal with Dick guilt of how he treated Jason, acting as he should have with Jason with Tim, then he had to deal with the role of Robin being snatched from him when Dick became Batman. Like he was only a stand in for something, someone more permanent to come along. Then Dick had to deal with me, and I was not the easiest kid in the world to cope with at the time.

“We all thought that Tim was delusional when he said that father was alive, we didn’t believe him and we drove him away, straight into the hands of my grandfather. Then when he did manage to bring father back from the time slip, he never even got so much as a thanks.” Damian took another bite of the pasta. “What I’m saying is, everything we have done has either been emotional or physical abuse towards someone who is supposed to be our brother, and I for one, am willing to change if and when we find him.”

Jason sat there numb, of course, Damian was absolutely right. 

They  _ had  _ to find Tim.

Because when they did, Jason was going to make sure that he treated him the way he way he deserved to be treated.


	2. Almost a Family Dinner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Looks like y'all are lucky!I probably wont update this as quickly as this all the time and honestly this is just a filler chapter. I was bored on the bus to work so I wrote out a few paragraphs of this chapter. I'm probably going to spend a lot of time on this because I don't want to forget about it or not finish it.
> 
> I also have a real soft spot for arkham knight jason, but theres not really going to be mention of that but their backstories are exactly the same, in that jason didn't really die, he escaped with deathstroke etc, I probably wont mention it tbh

After dinner, the four of them sat around the table discussing how to go about finding Tim. Barbara had said that she ran his face through a programme that she had for CCTV around the world. She narrowed the search down to one male in Stuttgart, Germany. 

Jason was mildly ashamed that he wasn’t wholly familiar keeping up with technological detective work, but took Babs at her word saying that the heights seemed to match up do Tim’s based on the objects around him.

Jason sat and stared at the picture, it was black and white and really grainy, but the person in the image  _ did _ look a lot like Tim, they were roughly the same size. The man in the picture was wearing what looked like a baggy hoodie, therefore, Jason suspected it could be someone else. It was then that something came to him.

“Fuck.” He muttered, then saying. “Tim has the best physique out of all of us to be able to blend in as a college kid, a normal teen, or something similar. We know that Tim can pull of more formal wear, no matter what, but he’s built in such a way that he can hide everything.

Dick raised a questioning eyebrow at Jason. “What?”

“Think about it this way. Even though Dick is smaller than me and Damian is in the middle of a growth spurt.” At this, Damian shifted uncomfortably. “You can tell we’re packing muscle. With Tim, he’s small and lean. If he puts on clothing that can hide all of that, like a hoodie and jeans, then everyone will just think he’s a normal skinny teen. No one will see what he’s packing until he takes his shirt off, you know? No one see’s Tim’s muscle unless he’s half nude or wearing a skin tight kevlar suit.”

Dick frowned at Jason, the he laughed. “Jay, do you have a crush on Tim?”

Jason was pretty sure he just choked on his own heart. “So what if I do? That’s  _ irrelevant _ and  _ not the point _ and  _ I do not  _ have a crush on him. I’m stating a fact.”

Dick shrugged, a smile still playing on his lips. “Yeah, sure. But you make a good point.”

Jason was pretty sure that he did not have a crush on Tim. More like a fondness for the teen that Jason’s not sure that he truly knows how to describe. It had taken a long time for Jason to realise that the resentment and hatred he felt towards Tim wasn’t actually the fact that Tim had replaced Jason. No, Jason’s anger was better aimed at Bruce. Jason had been kidnapped by the Joker. Jason was the one that had apparently died, the fallen Robin. Jason was not angry that Tim had replaced him, but angry that Bruce was willing to put another teenager in danger, another that was susceptible to being kidnapped by freaks, just like Jason had been.

Jason had sought Tim out to apologise to him. Unsurprisingly, Tim didn’t believe Jason’s attempt at an apology, keeping his staff poised at his side, ready to strike Jason, just in case. However, over the months Jason continued to seek Tim’s help and over that time they formed some sort of strange bond. Jason wasn’t deluded enough to think that Tim had truly forgiven him, and certainly didn’t trust him. 

They had a tentative partnership, but the worked well together, they fought together taking down human trafficking rings and messing with Black Masks new drug shipments every other week. Jason even found time to cook for Tim when Tim was willing enough to come back to one of his safe houses for an after patrol meal. Tim had even taken to keeping some clothes there for when he eventually went home.

Hell, it was Tim that convinced him to stop killing every criminal he saw fit.

However Jason had always wondered why Bruce wasn’t over in his area beating the shit of him every other week because of some warped delusion that Jason was maybe corrupting young Tim into the Red Hood lifestyle. Though, Jason now realised that Bruce probably didn’t even care.

That seemed like a common occurrence for Tim at this point.

“Jason!” Barbara’s voice broke him out of his thoughts. Jason looked over to her. “Glad that your back with us. Now, if you want, we can send you to chase this lead up, if you want. It was taken in a convenience store in Stuttgart. The store looks like it's seen better days, so Tim probably thought that the CCTV wasn't running or not even present.”

Jason just nodded, “yeah, I’ll go.”

* * *

A while later, Jason was laying across a rooftop at the edge of his territory, taking a well deserved break when he heard someone land softly on the roof.

“Should I put out a restraining order or call the police?” Jason huffed out a laugh. 

Damian snorted. “What like, ‘hello, yes, 911? Robin keeps finding me on rooftops close to crime alley and he won't leave me alone, also I’m the Red Hood’. Because that will work out so well.”

Jason didn’t even dignify that with a response, instead opting to keep laying down with his eyes closed. “So, what brings you here?”

“Dick and father were arguing about Tim.” Damian said, laying down beside Jason.

“Ah.” Then after a beat of silence. “He won’t forgive you easily, you know that right?”

“I am aware.” Damian sighed, putting his hands behind his head. “We also need a plan on how to get Tim to forgive all of our mistakes. It’s not like there aren’t already enough apologies to go around.”

Jason snorted. “I already had my foot in that particular door. I think I was getting on alright as well, until he up and Houdini'd, so that’s all on you and Dickie.”

“Do you have a crush on Tim?” Blunt. Jason usually prefers when people are blunt with him, but not when it feels like his stomach dropped out of his ass.

“Honestly, I don’t even know?” Jason wasn't sure why that was even a question. “I do know that I’m quite fond of him. He has this air around him that I know full well that he could kick my ass if he wanted to but at the same time I wanna wrap him up in blankets and protect him from the world”

Damian never said anything but Jason knew what he was thinking.

Jason was soft for Tim.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, give me feedback, I would love to hear from you!


	3. Close

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got punched in the tit at work today so I'm giving y'all another chapter for something to cheer me up
> 
> Also I do something weird in this chapter and I cant explain it but I feel like you'll know what it is and tbh idk why i did it + bonus at the end ;)

Damian will, for the rest of his natural born life, would never admit that he almost jumped a foot in the air when Dick slammed the door to Jason’s safe house closed. Damian was so deep in thought that he hadn’t even heard the door open. Dick came and flopped bonelessly onto the couch next to Damian.

“I really shouldn’t have expected anything else, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t have hope.” Dick said, angrily.

Damian hummed as Jason poked his head out of his bedroom, toothbrush in mouth, raising an eyebrow at Damian. Damian shrugged. Jason went back into his room and reappeared a few minutes later.

“Think this is the angriest I’ve heard you, Dickiebird.” Jason said, his tone somewhat amused.

Dick sighed. “That’s because Bruce is being an asshole.”

“What happened?” Damian asked.

Dick rubbed his eyes and sighed again. “I was trying to convince B to help us with the search for Tim, but he continuously refused, again. He stated that it would be good for Tim to have a break and that he would come back eventually, and while I do believe we all deserve a break now and then, he should at least know that's not what's going on here.”

Jason snorted. “B can’t honestly believe that? We all know that Tim considers sleeping a vacation. Boys too restless to be going on an actual vacation.”

“Not to mention that Tim would have taken his personal phone and would have at least told Barbara what he was doing.” Damian added. “As far as I am aware, not even Mr. Fox has any knowledge of why Tim left.” 

“This is just typical for Bruce.” Jason stated angrily. “He expects us all to do exactly what he wants, when he wants, without so much as a peep, but as soon as we want to bring one of us home from whatever is going on in Tim’s head, he just ignores it and acts like he doesn't give a shit.”

“He probably doesn’t” Dick said quietly. “Part of the reason I gave up Robin in the first place. Part of the reason why I was angry at Jason for being Robin.”

“You were angry at me for being Robin?” Jason raised an eyebrow at Dick.

“Yeah.” Dick seemed more sad than angry at this. “I was angry at you because I was jealous in all honesty. I saw that you were a really smart kid, a good fighter, intuitive and you’d become an even better Robin than me after time and experience. I was mad at the fact you replaced me after Bruce forced me to retire the title. Robin was  _ mine _ . It was the nickname my mother gave me as a child and I was angry that someone else could so easily fill the role.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “I thought I was supposed to be the one that was jealous?”

Dick laughed, but there was no humour behind it. “I… I killed him you know.”

“Who?” Jason asked.

“The Joker.”

Damian wished he could have filmed that exact moment. The surprise on Jason’s face was fleeting but it was there. “What?”

“He started a riot at one point and I managed to track him down to Gotham Cathedral and beat him to death. Unfortunately B showed up and revived him. B chewed me out for it, saying he revived him because of the guilt I would have felt for it.”

“Have you ever felt guilty about it?” Damian asked quietly.

“No, never.” Dick said, looking down at his hands. “My only regret is not stopping B from reviving him.”

This was something that Damian had never expected. Damian thought Dick had never killed another human in his life. His older brother was barely able to kill the bugs in his house. It surprised Damian.

“Anyway, long and short, Bruce isn’t going to help us financially.” Dick sighed. “I still have a fair bit of money put by for my Nightwing stuff, but I don’t think it will help finance this mission.”

“I have an account that I have the money from my drug lord days and Tim allows me to use his money whenever I want so I can contribute to it.” Jason added. “I’m hoping to find him in Stuttgart though, so we don’t have to use too much of Tim’s money.”

* * *

Jason was more exhausted than he expected when he face planted the bed in the hotel in Stuttgart. He hadn’t really slept in the past 48 hours and couldn’t really sleep on the plane over because of a crying child.

Jason groaned and sat up pulling his jacket off and throwing it on the chair beside his bed, the toed off his shoes, allowing them to land on the floor with a thump. Jason flopped back down onto the bed hoping to get a solid few hours of sleep, but his body now did not want to keep up with that memo and flashbacks of what Dick had said yesterday flashed through his mind.

It was surprising to hear Dick say that he had killed the Joker because he had “killed” Jason. He and Dick were never particularly close in his days as Robin. Dick had tried bonding with him a few times but it had really always ended on a sour note.

His relationship with Dick was still kind of strained. On the one hand, Jason couldn't really cope with how overbearing Dick was of him, the guilt that Jason saw in his eyes everytime Dick looked at him. On the other hand Jason  _ wanted _ a big brother, he wanted Dick to be his big brother, he wanted Dick to  _ take care of him,  _ in a way that only an older brother could.

_ Maybe when I get home I can give him a hug, a fresh start. _ That was the last though Jason had before he fell asleep, hoping it wasn’t too late to have a somewhat normal brotherly relationship with Dick.

A few hours later, Jason walked into the store, straight up to the cashier, he wasn’t really in the mood for messing around. Thanks to his traitorous brain he hadn’t really gotten much sleep.

The cashier looked up when Jason stopped at the counter. “Hallo, ich habe mich gefragt, ob du diesen Mann gesehen hast?” Jason asked, holding a picture of Tim that Dick had given him back in Gotham. 

The cashier took a good look at the photo and smiled at Jason. “Ja, er war heute morgen hier.” 

“Perfekt, danke.” Jason responded and turned and left the shop. 

Damnit, Tim could be anywhere at this point. Jason decided he’d wander the streets for a while, in search of anyone that looked even remotely like Tim, before he went and found somewhere to eat.

* * *

Tim was walking down the street toward the dank apartment that was his home for now when he spotted a familiar figure stepping out of the store that he frequented.

The bulk, white patch of hair and signature leather jacket made Jason stand out like a sore thumb to him. Tim quickly pulled his hood up and ducked into the alleyway he was walking past, hoping that Jason hadn’t spotted him. Tim crouched down behind the garbage bin, peeking out to see if Jason walked past the mouth of the alley.

The garbage was rotten and Tim couldn’t stand the smell of it, but as the minutes passed he saw Jason walk past the alley and disappear. Tim made a break for it. It seemed that they’d found where he was and Tim was sure he was not going to let Jason find him. 

Time to move.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I thrive on feedback :)


	4. Three Months Ago...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have no self control. I had this chapter written out then I rewrote it this morning.
> 
> Still not really happy with this chapter. But enjoy!

It has taken Tim a solid six months to carefully and strategically plan out how he was going to leave Gotham City. Tim was still not wholly sure that he wanted to leave Red Robin behind but if he was going to disappear he  _ had _ to leave the vigilante life behind. Tim did not want to be found when he left Gotham. He knew that Dick would want to try and find him and bring him back into the shit-fest that was Gotham’s “superhero” community. 

However, five months before his departure was due, Tim was almost blindsided by Jason one night. Tim’s patrol area was quite close to Jason’s territory and was prepared to fight him when Jason had landed on the rooftop that Tim was taking a break on.

Tim was prepared for a fight, what he was not prepared for however, was Jason to apologise for all his actions. Jason’s apology was so  _ sincere _ that Tim almost believed him, but he didn’t, but it wasn’t like Jason to back down from a challenge and they had began the tentative friendship they had when Tim left.

Jason was trying so hard to fix their relationship and Tim was tired of it all, he kept brushing off most of Jason’s attempts at being closer than they were. Jason was making Tim have doubts about leaving. Jason almost made Tim want to stay in Gotham.

Almost.

Tim was stuck to his plan on leaving, everything was planned out. Tim would leave everything behind, everything, then take the newly fake passport with his disguise in place, the 30 thousand dollars he had discreetly siphoned off his own bank account with him, he even left all of his clothing and technology behind. Tim wasn’t stupid, he knew they would be trying to track his whereabouts.

Tim knew that leaving was what was best for him. He was sick of it. Sick of being beaten, sick of being ignored when the other bats didn’t need something from him, and sick of being  _ used _ . Tim was tired, he was anxious. He slept less that ever did before, his nerves bubbling and reaching boiling point, Tim was constantly on the edge of hysteria and he wasn’t sure he could keep it contained anymore.

Panic attacks were almost nightly now, laying in bed trying to get an hour or two of sleep, Tim was almost at breaking point and he wasn’t sure how much more he could take.

So he left.

He had to have a fresh start, somewhere where no one knew him, maybe even meet someone and start a family. Tim was only nineteen but he felt a hell of a lot older than that.

Tim didn’t even look back when he got onto the plane and left Gotham City behind.

* * *

In Stuttgart, Tim managed to find a cheap apartment at the edge of the city. The apartment was basic, more of a bedsit than anything, a bed pushed into the corner, an old black and white TV on a crate, and a couch that had seen better days. Tim had bought himself a phone and laptop under a different name and hacked into his neighbour's WIFI.

Even though he had left Gotham behind, as much as he didn’t want anything to do with it, he found himself occasionally looking up the Gotham news. Tim kept telling himself that he was just checking that Jason hadn’t gone back to killing, but deep down he knew that he missed it, even just a little.

He could never fully ignore Gotham, the city had a strange gravity to it. 

Tim sighed, he had to get ready for work.

Tim had gotten a job at a market close to the city centre, he had scoped out the place before asking to work there, making sure that there were no cameras that Oracle could watch him through.

Looking at his reflection in the dirty mirror, Tim noticed that his hair had gotten longer, his face had filled out a little and he no longer looks as tired as before. Tim wasn’t really having panic attacks as much now and the tremor in his hand was almost completely gone.

Tim frowned at himself in the mirror, before turning and leaving the apartment for work.

* * *

If Tim was being honest, he did not think that the obvious security camera in the store had actually been working, just a ruse to stop people from trying to steal from the small store. So when he saw Jason walking out of the store, Tim wanted to slap himself in the face, of course it worked, why wouldn’t it. No matter how smart he was he could still be a bit of a dumbass. 

Tim avoided the streets of Stuttgart for the rest of that day, he had to move again. Tim was fully positive that he did not want Jason to find him. The only reason Tim could think that Jason would be here in the first place was because was to bring Tim home back to Gotham. Tim would never be ready to go back there.

Tim was currently driving across the German-Polish border, making his way up to Russia. Tim had stolen the car out of a low security pound and disabled the GPS in it. It wasn’t like the cars he had back in Gotham but as long as it got him to where he needed to be then he didn’t really care.

Tim took great care on trying to stay to more back roads, forgoing any main highways with traffic cameras. He was about 125% sure that Oracle was keeping an eye out for him and he wasn't about to get himself caught. 

Tim was sure to take extra care going anywhere now. He wasn’t about to let himself be caught again.


	5. Almost.....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WOOOOOO I reached over a thousand hits and 100 kudos, so here is a gift for ya'll. Also I have a cold and I'm working his weekend so I might not post so.....
> 
> In this i have now given Jason an undercut bc I am week for boys w undercuts, and I also have a headcanon that Jason likes being held but doesn't really show it because he wants to seem stronger than he is sometimes.

Three months after spotting Jason in Germany, Tim made it a point to move around every time he suspected he had been spotted on security cameras. Even going as far as to give any camera a small wave before disappearing completely. It was almost a game now, and even if Jason did catch up to him, he would have to physically force Tim to return to Gotham.

However, Tim admittedly missed Barbara, hell, he even missed Jason a little. Jason looked good when Tim saw him in Stuttgart. The haircut Jason had gotten had made him look younger, the white streak more prominent at his forehead. Jason had looked like he had bulked up a little too, Jason had looked attractive than the last time Tim saw him, not that Jason wasn’t attractive before.

Both Dick and Jason were extremely attractive and it made Tim jealous.

Currently, Tim was in Kyoto, looking for somewhere he could have lunch unwatched by Babs, he had already spent more than a week in Kyoto and was getting more and more paranoid that he had been caught here, not that Tim had actively spotted any security cameras though. Maybe he had another couple of days here before he had to move again.

Although, all of that came crashing down when he spotted a familiar and somewhat familiar-but-not-familiar walking down the street towards him. It was Dick and Damian, and holy shit, Damian had  _ grown. _ The last time Tim had seen Damian he was just clearing Tim’s height, now though, Damian was as tall as Dick. Damian didn’t seem as broad as he should be, meaning that he still had to fill out.

Tim had almost spun on his heel and ran but thanks to a surgical mask, half of his face was completely covered, Tim also had the hood of his winter jacket pulled up against the rain. As long as he didn’t look directly at them when passing, he doubted that they recognise him.

Dick and Damian seemed to be in a deep discussion of some sort, both of them huddled under an umbrella. Talking animatedly, and if Tim had to guess, it was probably about him.

Tim could understand why Jason would come after him. They were working together before Tim left and it did seem like Jason at least cared about him, even if it was just a little. Tim could even understand Dick looking for him, they were supposed to be brothers after all, but Damian? No, Damian hated Tim’s very existence. It was just bizarre and threw Tim for a loop, but then again, Dick could have dragged Damian here with him under the pretence of brotherly bonding. Dick was good at pretending to be the caring older brother.

Tim held his breath and looked at the sidewalk as he passed the brothers, listening into their conversation as they walked by.

“.... and Babs and Jay said he was spotted in Okonom….” Damian was saying as he passed.

Tim almost stopped when he heard Damian speak. Damian only called Jon by his first name, Damian would never resort to calling anyone by a nickname, and furthermore, Damian only ever referred to Jason as Todd or Red Hood, so calling Jason by anything else was a surprising left hook straight to Tim’s face.

However, Tim kept walking. It was time to leave Kyoto.

* * *

When Jason woke up, he found himself with his face pressed into Dick’s warm chest, one of his hands curled against his chest and the other thrown round Dick’s waist. Dick had one hand petting his hair and the other arm wrapped around his shoulders. 

Jason would deny till the day he  _ dies  _ the noise that left his throat or even the fact that he found that being held was actually endlessly comforting, even if it was someone who was supposed to be his older brother that was doing the holding.

“Little Wing?” Dick’s voice was quiet in the darkness of his bedroom. Though Jason didn’t know if it was dark, but he guessed since Dick was home.

Jason hummed. “Nothing in Kyoto?”

Dick sighed, giving one last scratched to Jason’s scalp before letting go of him. Jason took this opportunity to flop onto his back and stretch, confirming that it was indeed dark outside.

“Nah, to be honest I think he was long gone by the time we got there.” Dick sat up in the bed. “We even spoke to a few landlords in the area, just in case we could find him in one of the apartments, you know?”

“Find anything?”

“One landlord said looked at the picture and said that Tim had enquired about an apartment but eventually turned it down due to cost.” Dick threw his hands up and stretched, Jason heard his spine crack a few times. “After that, fuck all.”

Jason sighed and got out of bed. “You want something to eat before we go out?”

Dick smiled at him. “Yeah, sure.”

* * *

“I feel like Red is always about ten steps ahead of us at all times, the waves at the camera, finding literally nothing when we get there, he has to have plans of plans.” Jason said. Nightwing, Robin, and Red Hood were sat on the ledge of the clock tower, taking a break.

“I disagree actually.” Damian replied, stuffing a protein bar wrapper into one of the pockets on his utility belt. At least the little shit wasn’t littering, Jason thought.

“And what makes you say that, squirt?” Jason’s red helmet concealing his raised eyebrow.

“Because as much as Red is not an idiot, between the time he notices he’s caught and the time we get there, no more than a day has passed.” Jason could see Damian frown, the domino covering his eyes lowering with his brows. “I felt like we were close, too close, in Kyoto. We didn’t see him but that doesn’t mean he didn't see us.”

“Yeah, and when a lot of the population cover their faces with surgical masks doesn’t really help you know?” Dick chimed in.

Jason snorted. “You’d still think a white boy wearing a surgical mask would stand out. Specially with eyes that blue.”

“It was more common than you think, plus it was raining so he might have had his hood up too.” Damian said, somewhat indignant.

“Aww, you’ve noticed his eyes.” Dick cood at him. “Sounds like a crush!”

“I will not hesitate to throw you off of this clock tower, N, so help me.” Jason threatened.

Dick just laughed good naturedly at him, which in truth made Jason want to actually do it, just to wipe that all knowing smile off of his face.

“ _ My point,  _ if you two have stopped with your teenage girl nonsense” Damian said, sounding exacerbated at his brothers. “Is that I highly doubt that Tim will be very far from us when we go out to look for him, which  _ means, _ ” he stressed looking at both Dick and Jason pointedly, “we are just going to have to be more observant when we are there.”

Both Jason and Dick nodded in assent.

“Sure.” Jason said, slightly more upbeat. “Come on, Big Bird, we have bad guys to beat up.” With that Jason stood and lept from the clock tower, shooting out his grapple to land on a rooftop across the street, with Nightwing close behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls give me feedback bc i need Validation™


	6. The Angry Robin Club.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings of mentions of past alcohol abuse, I’ll put it in the tags when i can be arsed  
> I doubt I will update this weekend though I have no impulse control when it comes to this fic but I’m sick and I have to work Saturday and Sunday.  
> I havent read this at all, sorry for any mistakes.

The main issue, for Dick, with their whole mission to find and bring Tim home was how were they going to convince Tim to come home. Damian had been right about how Tim had been treated over the years and Dick see’s how much he was a part of the problem.

He ripped the role of Robin straight out of Tim’s hands.

At the time, Dick thought he was doing something good. Giving Damian something else to focus on, to be a better person, and that this might be the push for Tim to become something more than Robin; Batman’s sidekick. Dick  _ thought _ it was a good decision at the time, but the first time he saw Tim as Red Robin it never even struck Dick that Tim was still living under Jason’s shadow. Tim’s first Red Robin suit had looked exactly like Jason’s.

Dick knew no matter what any of them said to Tim, did for Tim, that Tim was not going to believe them.

Dick thought he was a good older brother, not making the same mistake he had made with Jason.

Dick looked over at Jason, they were sharing a bed in a hotel in Jeju City, the most recent city Tim had been spotted. Even though Jason had fallen asleep on his stomach his right arm was still curled against his chest, something that Dick knew Jason had done, even in his time as Robin. Dick wasn’t sure why he slept like that but Dick was positive it was something that he’d done a lot as a kid, living on the streets.

Dick still wished he hadn’t been such a fuck back in Jason’s days as Robin, he still felt guilt about brushing him off most of the time, for being angry at him, but after his and Jason’s sit down and  _ talk _ , Jason had told his predecessor that it didn’t matter, what they did in the future was what mattered. Dick was eternally thankful for the second chance that Jason had given him. 

As sleep started to cloud Dick’s mind, he hoped that Tim was going to be willing enough to give him a second chance too.

* * *

Damian was tracking a trail of maimed criminals to the Narrows. Damian was surveying the fall out from Jason’s recent clash with his father. Jason had gone to his father again to convince him that they had to bring Tim home. This father didn’t agree and began to berate and humiliate Jason right in front of Damian.

Jason’s rage was palpable, Damian was angry too. His father had no right to treat Jason the way he did when Damian had treated Tim almost the same way Jason had and his father had always brushed it off. Everyone thought that Dick was the golden son, but it never really measured up to being the blood son, even some of his mistakes were glossed over, like when he was fourteen and had murdered the leader of a dog fighting ring. 

Damian was almost passed the Narrows when he noticed that the trail of the Red Hoods victims had stopped, Jason was in his safe house.

Damian backtracked to the house, dropping onto the fire escape and slipping through the bedroom window. Damian notices Jason’s red helmet abandoned on the unmade mattress on the floor, he sighs and goes through to the living room.

Jason is sat, leaning forward on an old, worn sofa, his elbows on his knees, hands folded under his chin, staring at an unopened bottle of whiskey. 

“I can feel your silent judgement from over here, little bird.” Jason said, his voice was strangely calm. “Don’t worry, I’m not gonna drink it. Idea’s way better than the reality anyway.”

Damian’s shoulders sagged slightly in relief, he knew about Jason’s issues with alcohol abuse when he first came back. It was a relief to know that Jason wasn’t going to break is sobriety. The Red Hood was a hell of a lot more dangerous when he drank.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Damian already knew the answer.

“No.” There was a beat of silence. “Actually, yeah, I kinda do.”

Now that actually surprised Damian a little, he and Jason weren’t ones for bonding, and while Damian did actually want to be on good terms with  _ all _ of his brothers, he was okay with the fact that Jason wasn’t much of a sharer.

Seems like he was wrong. “Go for it.” Damian said, peeling the domino from his face.

“At first I had this small hope that maybe B was feigning disinterest since this is the most his former and current Robins have ever worked this well together without fighting.” Jason sighed and flopped back on the couch, wood and springs creaking in protest at the sudden new weight. “But no, tonight just proved that. He makes me think he’s glad to see the back of Tim. Which I would expect if it was me that pulled the disappearing act. I thought he loved Tim, but now I see that that’s not true.

“Tim was the one that forced himself to be Robin, the one that lived under the shadow of my death and was trained to be better than all of us. Tim is the one that has took on the most skilled fighters and  _ won _ and I thought that B would think the world of him. Now I just see that none of us will live up to his standards. We never will, even if we are Robin or not, and I’m so fuckin’ angry about it.”

“You’re right to feel angry at father.” Damian said. “What he said tonight. He wasn’t right.”

“No, but most of it’s true.”

“That doesn’t make it right, Jason.” Damian said, quietly. “No matter what father says, none of us will every live up to Dick’s legacy, but what he doesn’t see is that Dick is just as angry as the rest of us, but Dick doesn’t let that rage show too often, so father still thinks that Dick is the best of us. What father doesn’t realise is the toll that it takes on using children as your sidekicks.”

“What do you mean?” Jason asks.

“Anxiety, our nerves are frayed of years of stress, paranoia and fear. Anxiety doesn’t always show up as fear but it helps fuel our paranoia. It also helps fuel the rage that we feel too.” Damian shrugs, like it was simple.

“I think we were plenty fucked up before Batman got us.” Jason huffed an unamused laugh.

“Of course we were.” Damian shrugged again. “But instead of being brought into a loving and caring home environment, we were made to be soldiers and not sons.”

“Which begs the question: did he even ever love any of us.”

That was the million dollar question. “Maybe, maybe not. But at least we have each other to fall back on.”

“Yeah, we do, don’t we” Jason laughed. “We should rename ourselves ‘The Angry Robin Club.’”


	7. Brother, come home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ugh this was hart to write and didn't turn out the way i really wanted but. Sorry if this disappoints some people
> 
> The apartment I have them in in this chapter is the one i stayed in in Sicily and the place is so small that you find yourself in the same place multiple times a day.

4 MONTHS LATER

Tim was getting ready to move on from Rome when he saw Dick and Jason walked into the cafe he was in. Tim knew it was inevitable that he was going to be caught like this eventually, but he wasn't quite prepared for it to happen this soon, Tim hadn’t realised he had been spotted, he rarely left the small apartment he had rented, he’s had a tiring few weeks running, he was getting bad at hiding.

Tim was in a small, family owned cafe, when he spotted Dick and Jason. Only one exit through the front, other exit behind the counter, Tim was screwed, then Jason locked eyes with him and Tim’s heart sank.

Shit.

Tim was caught and he didn’t really have a plan for this situation that didn’t end up in a fight, and Tim was pretty sure that the nice older couple wouldn’t take too happily to a trio of Gotham vigilantes beating the shit out of each other in their cafe.

Tim watched as Jason said something to Dick before making his way over to him. Tim took a deep breath before Jason reached him. Tim was not in the mood to deal with the pair.

Tim stood as Jason reached his table. “Jason, I’m leaving. Don’t stop me, don’t follow me.”

“Tim, please.” Jason’s tone and eyes were pleading.

“I’m leaving.” His tone was final. Tim brushed passed Jason, ignored Dick and left the cafe. Tim rushed home to prepare to leave. He needed out of Rome and fast.

* * *

“Why did you let him leave?” Dick’s tone was mildly hysterical and he and Jason left the shop.

“Forcing him wasn’t going to help us.” Jason replied. “He looked as if he was geared up to fight, and I won’t fight him.”

Over the next day and a half, Jason and Dick, with the help of Barbara, managed to track Tim to Sicily. Tim hadn’t gone far, which was helpful and inexpensive. 

Tim was getting careless.

Jason and Dick travelled from Catania to Ortigia, Babs had said that Tim was spotted in Siracusa travelling to the small island of Ortigia.

Jason came to realise two things about Ortigia: First it was such a small island that him and Dick made it around half of it in a single afternoon and that there were far, far too many cruise ship tourists. It was making it almost impossible to find Tim.

“Oh, fuck off.”

Jason looked up from the map in his hands to see what Dick was swearing at. 

“For fuck sake!” For the fifth time that afternoon they had stumbled on to the massive square that seemed to connect all of the streets here. Piazza Duomo was impressive and beautiful, but frustrating each time they stumbled upon it. Jason almost turned back into the street they came from when he spotted a somewhat familiar mop of black hair.

The person that looked like Tim was sitting on the steps of the cathedral, staring out over the square at the restaurants at the opposite side of the cathedral.

Dick seemed to spot the same person, both of them making their way through tourists and citizens to reach the person. It was Tim and it looked like he hadn’t spotted them yet.

Both brothers sat on opposite sides of Tim, who sighed. “Didn’t I tell you not to follow me?”

“You did, but you know very well that I don’t listen.” Jason said, amused.

Jason wasn’t looking at Tim but he knew that the younger just rolled his eyes.

“What do you want?” Tim asked.

“To talk to you.” Dick replied. “We just want to talk, we won’t force you to do anything, but just hear us out. We miss you.”

Tim’s laugh was bitter, he stood up, making his way down the steps. “When we get back to the apartment, you will have half an hour. That’s it.” 

Both Jason scrambled after Tim, not willing to miss their opportunity to persuade Tim to come back to Gotham.

* * *

When they got back to Tim’s apartment, an small, open plan apartment that overlooked the Mediterranean sea, Tim pulled the armchair out to face the small sofa and told Dick and Jason to sit.

“So talk.” 

Jason and Dick looked at each other briefly. Tim noticed that both of them looked tired.

“Look, Tim.” Dick started. “We want nothing more to just to bring you home with us but we also understand that your angry at us and don't want to come home to Gotham.

“We all have come to realise that none of us have treated you as well as we should have. We were all bitter about something and took it out on you and we're sorry. Even me, even when I thought taking Robin away was going to help you grow as your own person, I now see that I didn’t handle that situation very well. 

“We’ve been making changes back in Gotham, talking about our issues instead of using each other as punching bags. We’ve been having weekly family dinners, patrolling together, working cases together. Even Damian is changing for the better. There is only one thing we’re missing and that’s you Tim. We all miss you, even Damian does. Damian is more that willing to apologise to you and try and move passed the past, just like what Jason was doing.”

“What about Bruce?” 

Jason's laugh was bitter, eyes betrayed the anger he was feeling. “Bruce is Bruce. He doesn't care about any of us.”

Tim scoffed. “He cares about Damian.”

“You'd be surprised.” Dicks smile was sad. “Damian stays at mine and Barbara's on the weekend.”

“He stays with me on Monday's and Friday's.” Jason added. “Even the Demon is sick of B's bullshit.”

Tim just stared at the pair of them. They're false promises weren't enough to sway him. Not that that mattered, their time was up and Tim wanted peace.

“You're time is up.” Tim stated bluntly. 

“Can you at least think about it?” Dick asked pleasingly.

“Maybe.”

“Look, Baby Bird, we’re absolutely not trying to force you to do anything, but, please, think about coming home.” Jason smiled sadly at Tim. “just think about it. We'll leave you alone now.”

With that Jason and Dick left the apartment. Dick had looked back at Tim looking as though he wanted to say something but Jason dragged him out of the door.

* * *

Later that evening, Tim was sitting out on the balcony as the sun set. He had his laptop perched on the stone table. He was looking at all of the vigilante news in Gotham. 

The first thing Tim found was a gossip column article, dated only one week earlier, there was a picture with it too.

It was the Red Hood and Nightwing sat on a rooftop somewhere in Gotham, both of them had their legs dangling off the edge, Hood had his hands partially raised in the picture and ‘Wing was laughing, presumably at whatever Hood was saying. The photo seemed to be taken from a window across the street.The headline read ”Are Nightwing and Red Hood Dating?”. Tim snorted, Dick was dating Babs and only ever wanted to be Jason’s older brother.

Reading through different news articles, Red Hood was seen teaming up on multiple occasions with either Nightwing or Robin, they were always seen in either, Hoods, Nightwings, or Tim’s patrol routes. It even seemed like Jason and Damian made a good team when they weren’t fighting each other.

No one was safe from them. Yet, it appeared that neither of them had killed anyone, which meant that Jason was keeping to his no killing rule. Which Tim didn’t really expect after this long.

The three of them working together almost made Tim want to believe that Dick and Jason were being more truthful than what Tim originally suspected. However, that didn’t mean he would expect anything to change if he went back to Gotham, there would probably no room for Tim or Red Robin in their new dynamic.

Though it left Tim idly wondering wondering what would happen if he did return to Gotham, would things change for the better? Would Damian become like a little brother to him? There were so many questions that could only be answered by returning.

Though, if it did all turn out to be false promises, Tim didn't think he could actually take that particular heartbreak.


	8. I'm sorry, big brother.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was the hardest chapter to write and it was also rewritten 4 times, that's probably why its so short. I want to now start getting to the bonding and the jaytim because this is a jaytim fic and they've only been in scene together for part of one chapter.

Either Gotham’s criminal underworld was getting slower or Tim’s new trio of stalkers were giving him space to re-establish himself, the irony of Tim having stalkers was not lost on him either. It was well into the night, when he heard someone land on the rooftop he was taking a break on.

“Red Robin?” Damian’s voice came from behind him. Tim briefly wondered how much it would hurt if he just threw himself off of the roof.

“What do you want, Robin?” Tim’s made sure that his voice betrayed none of the emotion that he was feeling, anger boiling in his stomach.

“To see how you are.” Damian came and sat beside Tim, keeping a little bit of a distance between them as not to spook Tim. “Maybe even to talk if you want to?”

Tim sighed. “I’m fine, Robin.”

“Good.” Damian didn’t sound very convinced. There was a beat of silence then: “Look, Red, I’m sorry.”

“You’d forgive that I’m not falling over myself to accept your apology.” Tim replied with the same toneless voice.

“I know, and I completely understand.” Damian said. “I guess what I really want you to know is that what I have done and said over the past five years was wrong. I realise how petty I was being. I was taught that the world was going to belong to me and I took that attitude everywhere I went. So naturally I thought Robin was going to be mine, and over time I was too naive and self absorbed to see how much my actions were actually damaging.

“When I came here, I didn’t see any of you as brothers. To me, you were all incapable of being my brothers because none of you were blood. I only ever took to D because he gave me what I wanted, he gave me Robin. Though in the past few years, and this year especially, it's been proven time and time again that my blood family are not what they should be, and honestly, I have actually bonded more with the people that aren’t my blood, but are better family than blood will ever be.”

“That…. That was more than I was expecting to be honest.” Tim was kind of shocked, he had never expected Damian to come out with that, it was actually nice for the younger to admit all of this to Tim.

“Well, of course.” Damian shrugged. “I was wrong, and I’m sorry for that.”

Tim just stared at Damian, who was looking out over the Gotham skyline. The teen did seem a lot calmer looking these days, he didn’t hold the same rigid posture that he used to around Tim.

“I’m not going to forgive you right now…” Tim started.

“I’d think you were an idiot if you were.” Damian interrupted.

Tim glared at him. “Don’t interrupt me.” Tim snapped.

“Sorry.” Damian seemed to shrink in on himself a little.

“As I was saying. I won't forgive you straight away, but I will give you a chance to make it up to me.”

“That’s all I ask for.” Damian said, he gave Tim a half smile. “Thank y-”

Damian was interrupted by the sounds of screams in the distance. Tim and Damian looked at each other before responding, both of them getting up and running towards the noise. All thoughts of their previous interaction forgotten.

They had bad guys to beat up.


	9. Family Matters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was at my mums yesterday so I didn't have time to finish this chapter. I have a migraine too so I wrote this chapter with my computers brightness at 25% I'm in so much pain.
> 
> I want to thank rikway, for the suggestion they made. It actually helped me write more of this chapter. If you guys have any suggestions for things that I might be missing then don't hesitate to make the suggestions, I'm always open for it, it even would help write things in the future.

A few days after his talk with Damian, Tim lay in his bed reflecting on the past few days. 

Damian had came and saw Tim each night, seeing if Tim wanted to team up and take down some criminals. Tim and Damian actually worked pretty well together when they weren’t fighting. That was when Damian wasn’t being pulled away to work with Batman. Damian honestly looked as if he was sick of working with Batman.

Damian also seemed to have an endless supply of protein bars, and it kind of concerned Tim as to where exactly the teen was pulling them from, it seemed like every night at 3am, like clockwork, Damian was handing him a protein bar. 

Tim could admit that it was slightly weird.

Damian had also told Tim that Dick and Jason were keeping their distance for now as they didn’t really want to freak Tim out. That Tim might find them overbearing.

Tim was pulled from his revivre when a security alert popped up. Tim grabbed his tablet off of his bedside table and brought up the security cameras. 

Tim saw Jason leaning against the doorframe to his apartment, a bag on one hand, smiling up at the hidden camera, of course Jason knew where his cameras were.Tim sighed and dropped the tablet on the bed, getting up and putting on pants before going and answering the door.

“You know normal people usually knock, Jason” Tim said in way of greeting.

Jason barked a laugh. “Normal people don’t usually have one of the worlds most high tech security systems for their apartment, Timmy.”

Tim rolled his eyes and stepped aside to let Jason into his apartment, so much for them giving him space, not that he really wanted space if he was being honest. 

“So to what do I owe the pleasure of your visit.” Tim asked. He knew Jason wasn’t here for a social call, the last time Tim checked it was still morning and Jason was rarely up and about until midday.

“Uh, brunch?” Jason said, holding up the bag. “But I was also going to ask for some help.”

“Help?”

“Yeah, I have this case that I’m working on that I really would like some help with.” Jason shrugged. “You don’t have to, I can get Dick and Babs to help, it’s just that you help keep me kinda sane.”

Tim raised an eyebrow at Jason.

“Yeah, we can talk about it over brunch, and you can decide what you want to do.”

* * *

So,” Tim said, taking a bite of his veggie burger. “Two poor or orphaned children have turned up dead in Gotham harbour, the street kids say that someone has been going around the streets picking up kids these past few weeks, and you reckon they’re being trafficked out of the city.”

“Yeah, most likely.” Jason confirmed, talking some fries from his plate.

Tim hummed thoughtfully. “Why me though.” 

“Because,” Jason shrugged, “your good at this kind of thing, you keep clam in most situations. Plus I do actually like working with you, your calm, level-headed, you know how to put up with my shit, and your not as overbearing as Dickie."

Tim raised an eyebrow at Jason.

Jason shrugged again. “Yeah, but like I said, you don’t have to, I’d just prefer it.”

Tim just looked at Jason, Jason was looking down at the table, twirling a fry between his fingers. Jason looked almost bashful.

“Yeah, sure, I’ll do it.” Tim said. “Send me what you have later and I will look through it.”

Jason outright beamed at Tim. “Thank’s Timmy”

* * *

Jason and Dick’s monthly lunch date, always on the last Friday of the month, had slowly become of Jason’s favourite days. Though, Jason would only admit that it was because of the free lunch, not that it was nice to spend some time with Dick that wasn’t in masks or where Dick is wrestling him for some kind of physical affection. 

This lunch was quiet, neither of them really talking, there was an elephant in the room and its name was Tim Drake. This was the first lunch they had together after Tim’s return.

Jason briefly wondered if Tim would agree to this sort of lunch date. Or a dinner date, something real romantic.

_ No, stop it. _

He wasn’t going to think about the fact that over the past week of working with Tim, Jason had realised just how smitten he was with the younger male. 

Jason could see while working with Tim just how sad his successor was. Tim’s careful mask slipped away when Tim thought Jason wasn’t looking. The tilt of Tim’s eyebrows and glassy way his eyes got told Jason everything. It genuinely made Jason want to protect Tim from the world as long as it would take to make Tim not be sad anymore. Even though Jason knew that Tim was more than capable of protecting himself, he also knew that Tim didn’t need to be strong all the time and was allowed to lean on other people. 

Although, Jason knew that if he was physically capable of making heart eyes, he would have them every time he saw Tim fight, all that raw power on display. Jason was allowed to be weak for strong guys, it was a thing, so sue him.

“You have that spaced out loving look on your face.” Dick’s voice filtered through his thoughts of Tim. “You thinking about our dear Timmy?”

Jason gave Dick a withering look, Dick was sitting there grinning so wide that it kind of reminded Jason of the Joker. “Stop smiling like that, your giving me flashbacks.”

Dick flinched. “Sorry Jay.”

Jason sighed and shrugged. “It’s okay. I was joking.”

Dick grinned at his again, but this one wasn’t as large. “Anyway, I was thinking that we could maybe invite Tim to the family dinner and movie night on Saturday.” Dick took a bite of his panini, chewing thoughtfully. “I’d say your both more than welcome to stay but I know you guys have that thing your working on.”

“Sounds good, I see him tonight so I can ask him.” Jason paused, raising an eyebrow at Dick. “Though it’s probably better that you ask him yourself.” 

“Your right.” Dick said. “But I’m a coward sometimes so…” 

Jason rolled his eyes. “Fine.”

* * *

When Jason got home rode into the garage that evening, he spotted Tim’s car. It was slightly unusual since Tim only ever came to Jason’s on his Ducati. Jason made his way up to his apartment, slightly confused.

Jason was more confused when he entered his apartment and heard Tim and Damian discussing tomorrow nights dinner, voices filtering through from the kitchen.

“Tim, Damian?” Jason asked, walking into the kitchen.

Both of them looked at him.

“Hey, Tim was kind enough to take me to school this morning so I left my stuff in his car, he picked me up after school and brought me here.” Damian shrugged. “That’s why I’m early.”

“Oh.” Jason said, dumbly.

Jason had never seen Tim and Damian be in the same room at the same time and not make jibes at each other or even just straight up brawled. It was mildly disconcerting.

“Tim said he can make vegetarian lasagna, so I said that he should make it for dinner tomorrow night.” Damian said, seeming excited. “I really enjoy lasagna, so it should be good.”

At this point Jason checked his door making sure he hadn’t accidentally went through a portal to another dimension. “What?”

“I said I can make it, not that would be any good.” Tim sounded almost shy at the admission.

Jason just resigned himself to the strangeness of the situation. “I can help you if you want. That’s even if you want to go. Dick asked me about it this afternoon at lunch.” 

“Yeah, I’ll go.” Tim smiled at Jason.

Jason let out a breath he didn’t knew he was holding. Jason wanted to slap the knowing look off of Damian’s face.

* * *

Tim was surprised to find that Dick and Barbara’s Gotham home was actually quite comforting, unlike their house in Bludhaven, this one was more lived in and comfortable.

Dick, Barbara, Jason, Damian and Tim were sitting around the fire waiting for the lasagna to cook in the oven. It was fun cooking with Jason, even though Tim found Jason quite strict in the kitchen.

Tim was glad for the opportunity to have everyone here. Tim thought it was time to give his story for them to understand why he truly left.

“I have something I want to tell you all.” Tim announced. The room went quiet, only the crackle of the fire could be heard.

“Go on, we’re listening.” Barbara encouraged.

Tim took a deep breath. “I have been alone my whole life. My parents were barely ever there. I had no siblings. So I thought that, when I became Robin, I would be a little less alone, but it didn’t turn out that way. People died, and I couldn’t stop it and I just felt even more lonely.

“I mean, you were around Dick and I was glad I was finally getting a brother, something that I had always wanted, but you went back to Bludhaven more often than not and I still felt lonely.

“Then Jason and Damian came onto the scene and I had to fight so much, I was tired and alone and I didn’t want to keep fighting. When Robin was taken from me and you guys didn’t believe me about Bruce, I was so hurt. I had to go off on my own and ended up helping Ra’s al Ghul of all people. Which  _ that’s _ never came back to haunt me.

“It made me a mess, the sadness, the loneliness, all of the fighting with people that are supposed to be my brothers. I got anxious, I was… No I am anxious, I am depressed. I didn’t have the support system that I should have had, I didn’t have anyone that I could talk to about it. I snapped, I couldn’t cope anymore, So I left.”

By the end of his monologue, Tim was looking at the floor. Tim saw Dick drop to his knees in front of him, Dick took Tim’s face in his hands.

“Tim look at me.” Dick commanded. It wasn’t forceful, Dick’s voice was soft, but the command was still there, Tim looked at him. “You don’t ever have to feel like that again, Baby Bird. We’re here for you, we’re here for each other. You don’t have to feel alone again.

“I know that it will take time for us all to forgive each other for all the issues that we had, but we will get there one day. None of us have to feel alone anymore.”

Dick pulled him into a hug, the sincerity in Dick’s voice almost made Tim want to cry, and as angry as Tim was at them, he couldn’t help but feel that this was heading in the right direction. The direction that they could all be the brothers that they were supposed to be.


	10. Intermission.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, So i’ve been away recovering from my migraines and making plans for christmas, so I haven’t been able to write.
> 
> Sorry, I sort of push past a bit of plot in this chapter, just for the fact that I want to move on with this story cause I don’t want it to end up being like 50 chapters long. Though I am going to start planning ahead for the next couple of chapters and I also need to do some research for one of them oops

Over the past few months, Tim had found himself fitting into the new dynamic that had changed while he was away. He had worked a hard case with Jason. There were twenty new traffickers in prison and the children had two new heroes. Tim had went back to Bludhaven with Dick a few times, helping him deal with the gangs and petty criminals. It turned out that Jason was helping control the gangs of Bludhaven too.

The strangest part for Tim was helping Damian set up to make Robin more than Batman’s sidekick. His own vigilante to be feared, not that it took much for people to fear Damian. The strangest part of it all was seeing Robin work more often without Batman. Back in the days that Tim stalked the streets with his camera, he rarely say Robin without Batman and vice-versa. Though if anyone could make Robin step out of the shadow of the Bat, it was probably Damian. 

After the dinner that Tim had told the others his feelings, they had went out of their way to check up on him on almost a daily basis. Dick would text him every day to make sure that he was okay or to send Tim some ridiculous pun, Jason was almost constantly round at Tim’s, they would either cook together or Jason would read as Tim worked on his computer, both sitting in companionable silence, it was nice. Even Damian would either drop by, usually on a Wednesday after school with Coffee and brioche from Tim’s favourite coffee shop, either that or he would spot him off in the distance at night, which Tim admits is a little creepy, even of there is no ill intent.

Dick had fully settled himself into the annoying overprotective older brother role, and when Dick wasn’t trying to be, he was actually a really good older brother, and even though Tim wanted to fall headfirst into being Dick’s younger brother again, he was hesitant, but Dick was patient with him and that was something Tim really appreciated.

With Damian, Tim didn’t fully feel that they were brothers yet. He and Damian had to work through a lot and while it was slow going, their relationship was moving in a more positive direction. Although, Damian was still a little shit but Tim felt that was more in an annoying little brother way.

Then there was Jason. Tim felt different towards Jason, there wasn’t really a brotherly connection there. In the beginning Tim wondered if it was because Dick was already there when Tim became Robin and Damian was brought into the family after. He had more of a connection with the other two. Though, since coming back to Gotham, Tim began to realise that it was maybe because he didn’t really want Jason to be his brother. 

That was probably due to Tim’s childhood crush on Jason when he was Robin.

Tim thought that childhood crush had dissipated when Jason came back and made several attempts on Tim’s life, but as it turned out, that wasn’t really the case. Maybe saying that the heart wants what it wants is true no matter what, or maybe it was some form of late stage Stockholm Syndrome. Tim wasn’t entirely sure.

What he was sure of is that when Jason comes round to his apartment to just spend time with him, he has a warm feeling in his chest. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm still sorry because this chapter makes no SENSE, but I crave feedback so :)


	11. Gathering and planning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s december and nowhere near this but?????? I had too. Also second chapter today since these are both short compared to my other chapters, now onto planning the jaytim!

“What did you get Tim for his birthday?” Dick asked, perched on Jason’s bedroom window.

Jason threw his shirt in Dick’s direction. “I have a front door, idiot.” Dick caught the shirt out of the air and stepped into Jason’s room.

“Not what I asked.” Dick wasn’t even in his Nightwing costume, sometimes Jason wondered about Dick’s well being.

“If I told you, would you tell me what you got him?” Jason countered.

Dick laughed flopping onto Jason’s bed. “Absolutely not.”

Jason contemplated throwing Dick straight back out of the window, but knowing Dick he would just hold onto Jason and he would be dragged out the window with him.

Jason sighed. “What are you doing here anyway?”

“Uh, it’s Tuesday, dude.” Oh. Jason had almost forgotten that Dick came round on Tuesday’s. “It’s cuddle time with BB!”

Jason had no idea what the BB stood for, Big Bro? Baby Bro? Big Bird? Jason had no idea but he wasn’t going to question it. Jason glared at Dick, who laughed.

“We could invite lover boy if you want…” Dick coo'd, wiggling his eyebrows.

“That’s it!” Jason rushed over to Dick and went to grab the front of his shirt, but Dick rolled out of the way, laughing the whole time.

“Okay, I’m sorry, I won’t invite him over.” Dick said, still laughing. Jason huffed, he was due a brawl with his older brother. “Come on, Little Wing, let’s go to bed.”

* * *

Dick was getting increasingly nervous the closer it got to July, he had ordered Tim’s gifts at the beginning of June and only one of them had arrived at his house. The first gift to arrive was already wrapped in deep blue wrapping paper and sitting at the back of his closet, but the other one had not even been shipped. 

Dick had taken to planning Tim’s entire birthday party, dinner and gift giving at Dick’s house and then the four of them could patrol through Gotham together if Tim wanted that.

Dick had even gotten members of the Justice League, Teen Titans, Jason’s Outlaws and their family to send cards and gifts for Tim that had been steadily arriving at Dick’s house over the past month.

It hadn’t taken much convincing to get them to send him stuff for Tim, especially when he told them that he was part of the reason why Tim had left Gotham in the first place, and that he wanted to really make it up to Tim.

Dick wanted this to be the best birthday Tim would ever have.

* * *

Jason knew that his gifts were dumb, but he wasn’t about to use Tim’s own money to buy him a gift, it wasn’t like Jason could even buy a gift for Tim that Tim couldn’t already buy himself. 

So Jason, over the space of a month, handmade Tim’s gifts. Jason had placed them into a red gift back, along with a dumb birthday card, and left them at Dick’s house, there weren’t any hiding places at Jason’s apartment that Tim didn’t poke his nose into.

Dick didn’t give Jason too much time to think about the lameness of his gift for Tim as he was sent to his Outlaws to gather birthday stuff. Artemis and Roy gave Jason a birthday card and they even got Bizarro to draw a picture for Tim. 

However, Jason was still nervous. He wanted Tim to have a good birthday this year.

* * *

Damian thought the gifts he had gotten for Tim would be suitable for him, but Damian had became increasingly frustrated at wrapping his gift. It had kept ripping apart every time he moved it. Damian ended up wrapping it five times with the red and green striped wrapping paper and tying yellow ribbon at both ends.

If it fell apart after that, Damian thought he would go insane.

Luckily, it stayed together.

Damian knew that Tim would like his gifts, but he wasn’t sure that Tim would use the one that was meant for use. There was, however, a small part of Damian that thought that Tim would be disappointed in the gifts that he got. 

Damian would be disappointed if Tim didn’t like them, he did spend a month hand carving the ornamental one and hoped fiercely that Tim would put it on display in his apartment. 

* * *

On the day of Tim’s party, Dick was anxious and annoyed. Jason had texted him earlier that day to tell him that Bruce had invited Tim to a birthday brunch. Dick knew that Bruce didn’t have any tact and would probably end up upsetting poor Tim. 

Currently Damian was with Tim and making sure he got ready for the “monthly family dinner”. Tim none the wiser to the birthday dinner. Though Damian had texted Dick with a Code Red, meaning that Tim  _ was upset.  _

It made Dick want to punch Bruce right in the face.

Dick and Jason got the living room ready, Barbara was in charge of decorations and sat off to the side instructing them and occasionally blowing up balloons. The decorations were over the top and gaudy but none of them had really had a normal family birthday party, but  _ god dammit  _ they were going to start having them. With the hopefully added benefit of cheering Tim up.

They were nearly finished with the decor when Damian texted Dick.

**_Lil D:_ ** _ We’re on our way. ETA 15 minutes. _


	12. Best Birthday Ever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> with this i probably mention heroes that are not in canon or continuation as their alter egos with each other or whatever but go with it bc its a point to make w tim also sorry this was hard to write and I have not reread this bc im shit
> 
> EDIT: I have now planned that this will be 20 chapters long.

Tim was genuinely surprised when he walked into a chorus of “surprise”as he went into Dick’s living room. Tim had known that the others were planning something, he knew they were keeping some sort of secret from him the past month. Tim didn’t expect a birthday party, he hadn’t even realised his birthday was coming up.

Dick, Jason and Barbara were around the living room with big smiles one their faces, throwing confetti into the air. The room was covered in decorative ribbons, balloons and banners. It was kind of ridiculous.

“Happy birthday, Timmy!” Dick shouted, making his way over to Tim and pulled him into a hug. “Are you okay?” Dick whispered into his ear.

Tim shook his head against Dick’s shoulder. If Tim had known that brunch with Bruce was going to be as bad, he would never have went. Bruce had gave Tim a plain birthday card with just his name signed inside. Their conversation was stilted and nothing ever ventured towards Tim’s personal life, with or without the vigilantism. Neither did he talk about the new closeness of his sons. It was very typical Bruce and Tim wasn’t sure why he was still upset by it, but it never failed to do so.

Dick let go of Tim, leaving one arm around his shoulders. “What do you think?”

Tim looked at the decor. “I think Babs did a good job at directing you idiots.” Tim grinned at Barbara. 

“Thanks, Tim.” Barbara said as Dick gasped in feigned shock.

Tim ignored is protests of it being a group effort when Jason came in for a hug and Tim was blessed with a face full of Jason’s muscled chest. “Happy birthday, Baby Bird.”

Tim smiled into the hug. “Thanks, Jay.”

“Come on,” Jason said, letting Tim go, “dinner is almost ready.”

* * *

Once dinner was done, Dick dragged Tim back into the living room so that Tim could open his gifts, ignoring all of Tim’s protests that they didn’t have to waste their money on him.

There was a small pile of cards next to a large box of gifts. Tim frowned at the sheer amount there actually was. Tim decided to open the cards first, more out of curiosity than anything.

The first card was clearly made on Moonpig. It was a picture of The Flash, Kid Flash and Impulse. They must have gotten the card delivered to their own house as their own handwriting was inside the card with the message “I hope your birthday isn’t too speedy!” which could have only been Bart’s dumbass message.

There was a gaudy birthday card from Oliver with little drawn on green arrows that made Tim crack a smile.

The card from Diana, Donna, and Cassie had nice messages inside that made Tim feel back about destroying Diana’s home.

There was a plain card that had messages from and signed by Kori, Rachael, Garfield, Jackson, Jaime, M’gann and Victor. 

At the last of the cards Tim laughed. It was a congratulations card that had “for your birth” written at the bottom of the card. It was from Roy and Artemis. The handwriting at the front being Roy’s. A folded piece of paper fell out of the card. It was a drawing of Red Hood, Artemis, Arsenal and Bizarro with a small pup pup drawing at the top right hand corner, there was a message written at the bottom of the page by Artemis. Tim knew he would frame Bizarro’s drawing.

The pile made Tim feel happy, he was touched that they took their time to write nice messages in birthday cards for him.

Tim then moved onto the gifts. He picked up a thin brown package, the post mark was from Metropolis. Peeling off the paper and lifting off the lid of the box he was delighted to see it was Superman pyjamas. The card inside the box, written by Lois, saying that “Superman is better.” The card was signed by Clark, Lois and Jon.

The next package looked the exact same. Upon opening it Tim discovered it was one on Kon’s old Superboy shirts. Kon’s card was a joke brother card that made Tim laugh.

The next gift was a red bag taped closed with duct tape. Tim raised an eyebrow at Jason who just shrugged. Tim ripped off the tape and pulled the gift out. A small misshapen plush doll sat inside a black mug. The plush, even though slightly badly made, was quite clearly supposed to be Red Hood. 

Tim held up the doll. “Why?”

“Because you love me the most.” Jason said with a grin.

“That’s somewhat debatable.” Tim said with a raised eyebrow, wiping the grin off of Jason’s smug face. The mug was mostly black with a blue stripe painted around it with beautifully crafted letters on the side saying “Nightwing Sucks”. 

“Thanks, Jason.” Tim said with a smile. 

Tim moved onto the next gift, wrapped in yellow paper, with giant “love, Babs” written on it and three hearts drawn on. After ripping the paper off, Tim held a red and black handmade blanket with a hood on it. 

“Did you make this?” Tim asked Barbara in awe.

“Yeah, I knitted a hood on it so you can wear it when your sitting at the computer in the winter.” Barbara shrugged. “I made myself one when I first started knitting and its actually super comfortable.”

“When did you start knitting?” Jason asked. Seemed like Tim wasn’t the only one that didn’t know about this new hobby.

“Not long after I got the chair.” Barbara shrugged again, though she looked a little upset. “When I became Oracle I wanted a hobby that didn’t involve staring at screens so I took up knitting.”

That revelation made a lot of sense to Tim. “Thanks, Barbara. I love it.”

Barbara smiled at Tim. “You’re most welcome.”

The next gift is one that made Tim the most curious, it was long, roughly six foot in length, wrapped in red and green wrapping paper with yellow bows at each end. Tim would have guessed what it was but it was too thick to be a new Bo staff.

“Apologies, the paper kept ripping so I had to wrap it several times.” Damian said, sounding somewhat shy. “I could get you a knife if you want.”

“No, that’s okay.” Tim replied absentmindedly as he started tearing off the wrapping paper.

Once Tim got the paper off the top of the gift, he realised that it wasn’t just one staff but  _ two.  _ Tim gripped both of them, sliding the paper off the rest of the way. One of the staffs was wood, with intricate designs carved into it. The carvings in the deep red/brown wood didn’t really have much of a clear interpretation but the design was beautiful. The other was metal, red and black, and it looked like it was retractable. The flat end at one side had a small yellow Red Robin symbol on it.

“The wood one is purely ornamental. You can display it in your apartment if you wanted. I think it would snap if you used it.” Damian said, he sounded confident, but the way she shifted in this seat showed his nerves. “The other one is mainly steel, with a titanium coating, completely retractable like your other staff. I thought you might like a new one, since your old current one might be a bit worn now since you’ve had it since you were Robin.”

“Yeah…” Tim truly didn’t know what to say. Both staffs were amazing. This was a gift that he did not expect to get from Damian. “Yeah, I'll give it a try. Thank you, Damian.”

Damian seemed to sag with relief, though Tim wasn’t looking at him. Tim moved the staffs to lean against the living room wall.

The last gift was two boxes wrapped in blue paper. One box was slightly larger than the other.

“I’m going to say that compared to Dami’s gift, mine seems kinda lame now.” Dick said, shrugging with his hands. Tim could see Jason roll his head onto the back of the couch beside him, Jason let out a sad laugh.

“It’s okay.” Tim said moving to open the bigger of the two boxes,when he pulled off the paper he saw that it was a replica Millennium Falcon model. It was one that Tim had thought about buying himself a few times but could never justify actually having it. Moving onto the next gift, Tim laughed. It was a Star Trek Next Generation USS Enterprise replica with built in bluetooth speakers. 

“Apparently that one lights up.” Dick said with a quiet laugh.

Tim smiled. “It’s great, thanks Dick.”

After opening all of his gifts, Tim placed them back into the box, with the exception of the staffs. Even with his earlier qualms about them buying him gifts, it sent a wave of happiness through Tim. This was the most amount of gifts that he had ever received on his birthday, and the most attention too.

“Alfred sent over a cake for you as well.” Damian said. “He apologised that he couldn’t make it to your birthday and would come to the office on Monday and take you out to lunch.”

Tim smiled sadly, he missed Alfred, but there was some joy in knowing he would see him soon and that one of his cakes was here to be eaten.

* * *

Halfway through patrol that night, the four boys sat on top of the Wayne Enterprises building looking out over the City. Tim could say that this had been one of the best birthdays that he had ever had, he had gotten gifts, eaten Jason’s cooking, had some of Alfred’s cake and was even using the new bo staff that Damian had gotten him. 

“Hey, thanks for today.” Tim said, quietly. “It’s been my best birthday yet.”

Dick pulled Tim into a side hug, while the other two hummed. Despite brunch with Bruce, this had been one of the best days since he came back to Gotham, Tim really hoped that this really was a new chapter in their lives and hoped that none of them would fuck it up.

Tim had never been happier than he was in that moment.


	13. Jason

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I wrote some of this on my way to Dundee and back. This chapter and the next one are kinda lame and a bit too quick but eh the next chapter (14) will be up either tonight or tomorrow morning :)

Jason knew he was fucked. Down right screwed and he didn’t think he even cared anymore.   
He needed advice and he knew exactly who to go to.  
Barbara didn’t even seem startled as he dropped down from the roof entrance of the watchtower.  
“What’s so important that I get a visit from the big bad Red Hood?” Barbara asked, amused.  
“I need to get something off my chest.” Jason stated, pressing the release of his helmet and pulling it off.  
“What like?” At this Barbara turned her chair to face Jason. “Is this about your thing for Tim?”  
“How…” Jason stopped before asking, of course Barbara knew everything.  
“So, what’s going on in that head of yours?” Barbara asked, he voice soft, coaxing.  
Jason sighed harshly through his nose. “I don’t know how to say it without sounding like a love struck school girl.”  
“It still wouldn’t be as embarrassing as Dick’s unnecessary love of his Discowing days.” Barbara joked.  
“Probably not.” Jason laughed. “I can’t believe I was actually there to witness that in person, Tim and Damian were spared the grief.”   
Barbara chuckled. “Me neither, to be honest.”Barbara’s smile went soft. “Seriously, Jason, you can tell me anything.”  
Jason sighed. “It’s been since I realised that it wasn't Tim that was my problem. Ever since then, since the apology and working with Tim I really saw him for him.  
“Like, Tim is so powerful and so beautiful when he moves and fights, you know?” Jason flung up his hands, at this point he might as well get it all out. “Like at first glance, with his size, you’d expect it to be easy for most of the guys we go up against to take him out, but he exceeds any and all expectations and when you watch him fight you know he knows he’s won his fight before he’s even won it. Yet, he’s not like me or even Damian, he knows he’s powerful but he never seems to brag about it, and that’s all without his staff. Once he has it then it’s game over for most people, and I would know how much that shit hurts.  
“Then again at the same time, while Tim didn’t have the same life living on the streets as me, he still had a pretty shitty life, and with the amount of times people have died around him and not cared about him, not took care of him, it’s easy to see why he is the way he is mentally.  
“It’s not like his fear is gone now either. I’m sure he still expects us to drop him, and it hurts in a way I didn’t expect it too, because I know for a fact that none of us are leaving him again, so that makes me want to keep him in the apartment and protect him from everything. I can’t do that though, because Tim is independent, strong, and amazing, but from experience I know that all he wants is people to be close to him and I want to be close to him, I want to love him and take care of him, make sure he is safe.  
At the same time, no matter how much I want to be the one he comes home to, the one he wakes up next to, I want him to find someone that is so much better than me, that can give him everything he needs without having the history that me and Tim have. I just want Tim to be happy.” Jason sighed sadly. “And that would be if Tim even liked me that way, which I doubt he does.”  
“Oh, Jay.” Barbara rolled up to Jason and reached out for a hug, Jason knelt in front of her chair, pulling her into a hug that almost pulled her off the chair and onto the floor with him.   
“Look, Jason.” Barbara started as she let Jason go, righting herself on her chair. “I know saying that ‘just tell him’ is easier said than done but honestly, with the way we all are, it’s probably the best way to go about it.”  
“I know.”  
“You can’t do it can you?”  
“No,” Jason shook his head, “I know what you mean, and with Tim I think that it is the best approach but I’m scared.”   
“J just think about it okay?” Barbara said, ruffling his hair. “Now go, I have to get back to work. These Bats are awfully persistent about getting information ASAP.”  
Jason just nodded. “Thanks Babs.” He said as he grappled out of the watchtowers hidden vent, Jason thought he heard her mutter something but was too far away to hear what it was.  
The thing was Barbara was right, Jason thought as he made his way back to his safe house in the Narrows, and that was the scariest part. A part of Jason feared the outright rejection that he would get if he were actually to go and confess to Tim and that fear made him want to crawl into a hole and die. Another part of Jason feared the humiliation of telling Tim about his feelings, even though Jason knew that each of the four of them were just as fucked up as the other, they weren’t always forthcoming with their feelings unless it was forced out of them.


	14. Tim

Damian had invited Tim out for coffee but Tim was staring out the window and had been for the past twenty minutes.

“Tim.”

Tim looked at Damian, seeming to realise that he was still there. “Sorry, I was thinking about something.”

“Are you okay?” Damian asked, concerned.

“Huh? Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.” Tim still seemed distracted.

“Do you want to talk about it.” Damian ventured.

Tim frowned. “Not really.” There was a pause. “Actually I kind of do want to, but it's embarrassing.”

“Okay?” Before Damian would have taken any chance to embarrass Tim, now he just wanted to make sure that Tim felt comfortable. “It's okay, you don't need to talk about it, but it might feel good to get it off your chest.” 

“It’s about Jason.” Tim said quietly.

“Jason? What about him?” Damian frowned. “Has he done something to you?”

“What?” Tim frowned. “No, he hasn’t done anything to me.”

“Then what’s wrong?”

“I’m attracted to him.” Tim said so quietly that Damian would never have heard him if he was just a normal person.

“What?” It took Damian to register what Tim meant. “ _ Oh?” _

“Yeah.”

“You mean you find Jason physically attractive and you don’t think of him as a brother?” Damian was shocked. He wasn’t entirely expecting this news. Damian was more beginning to think that Tim was maybe having second thoughts about coming back.

“Yeah, but not only physically but emotionally.” Tim looked back out the window. “I mean Jason is definitely more than physically attractive, but it’s comforting being around Jason, like I can see us  _ being together  _ and honestly, it scares the shit out of me just how much I actually like him. To be honest, the fact he’s physically attractive and well built is just an added bonus.”

“Of course you would like the strong ones.” Tim gave Damian a withering look. “I mean you did have crushes on Kon and Clark, I’m sensing a pattern.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “Sticks and stones, little brother.” Tim pointed at him. “Don’t forget your in love with a Super, much more than I ever was.”

Damian choked on his tea.  _ “I am not in love with Jon.” _

Tim grinned at Damian. “I do believe I never mentioned Jon’s name.”

Damian could feel his face burn. “Shut up.” 

Damian wished he could wipe the smug grin straight off of Tim’s face. “Anyway, we’re talking about your love life not mine.”

Tim just hummed, going back to drinking his coffee and staring out the cafe’s window.

“I think you should tell him.” Damian suggested.

Tim smiled sadly out of the window. “It would be easy to just tell him if it weren’t for my soul crushing fear of rejection.” Tim looked at Damian, the look in Tim’s eyes showed a hint of that fear. “I don’t know if I could take it.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry.....
> 
> Please give me feedback!


	15. I Love You.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry!!! This chapter was supposed to be twice this size but I had the start written and forgot where I was going with it.
> 
> I might not update this over Christmas, I work as domestic so I'm pretty much working over the Christmas period and I have a lot of family that I need to visit. But have a good Christmas! (if you celebrate it!)

Tim had decided to take the night off from everything, he had shut down all the computers in what he called his “vigilante only” room. Instead he was spending the night in front of his “civilian computer”. The tech in that computer was hardly worse of than the tech in his other computer but this one was designed for his civilian business and gaming. 

Tim had decided to spend the night gaming, after he had his dinner and a shower, dressing just in Kon’s old t-shirt and boxers, he sat down and began playing. 

Tim was vaguely aware that Jason had dropped by his place earlier on in the night asking if he was going out patrolling but Tim had told him he was taking the night off. 

It had been a few hours since then and Tim’s security went off. The picture that popped up on the tablet next to him showed that Jason had came through his bedroom window.

Tim took of his headphones and heard Jason stumble into the room, dropping his helmet onto the hardwood flooring. “Tim.”

The tone of Jason’s voice had Tim turning in the chair and on his feet in seconds, Jason looked pale, eyes wild, there was blood on his ear and jaw.

“What happened?” Tim went up to Jason and pulled him towards the sofa, “where are you hurt?”

Jason’s breathing was to fast for him to give an answer, so Tim checked the side of his head, there was a cut along the shell of his ear.

Tim took Jason’s face in his hands. “Jason look at me.” Jason looked at him. “Good, now I’m going to get the first aid kit and some water. I’ll be right back but I need you to control your breathing. You got that?”

Jason nodded as much as he could in Tim’s hands.

“Okay, I’ll be right back.”

Tim got up and rushed to the kitchen, going over to the cupboard under the sink for his first aid kit and pulling it out, on the way back over to Jason. Tim made his way over to sit down beside Jason and began to clean the blood off of his ear. Jason hissed when the antiseptic wipe touched his wound but made no move to get away from the sting. The cut on Jason’s ear wasn’t deep enough for stitches, so Tim cleaned the wound and as much of the blood as he could off of Jason. 

Tim closed up the first aid kit when he was finished and handed Jason the bottle of water, Jason’s breathing had turned somewhat normal and he had lost the wild look in his eye.

“Jason, can you tell me what happened?” Tim said soothingly, rubbing a hand down Jason’s back. 

“Tim.” Was all Jason said, his voice rough, he didn’t look at Tim.

“Yeah, I’m here Jay.” Tim said softly, he began rubbing circles into the space between Jason’s shoulder blades with the knuckles of his fingers.

“Tim, I think I’m in love with you.” Jason said, finally looking Tim in the eye.

Tim froze, his hand pausing in it’s actions.

What?


	16. A Note.

Okay, I am so sorry, my dear readers. I know I basically ended this fic on a fucking cliff hanger, but I lost this like 2 chapters ago and honestly it became really tedious to write. Honestly this fic began to stress me out sort of half way through.

Though I do still have like 5 chapters with planning, so I might make a couple of one shots in the future once I de-stress from this entire thing, cause honestly, I've been putting off writing it for the past little while and I didn't enjoy writing it.

I am writing another fic that I love, though, I'm not throwing everything I have into it. It's called Roommates and its a roommate au. This one is pretty easy to write and I've not been stressing myself over it. 

[You can read that one here.](https://archiveofourown.org/works/17023035/chapters/40021929)

I do have another one shot series that i'm writing, so stay tuned for that. It will be a futuristic au

Again, I am sorry, but I wont stress myself out in the name of some fic that I've came to actually really hate. I've wanted to straight up delete it a few times.

Sorry.


End file.
